From Approval-Seeking To Truth-Speaking
wild muse
Pleasing others is feedback. It’s telling you that you’re trying to get people to like you so you don’t lose their love, respect and connection. Sacrificing your own needs and desires to accommodate others often seems easier than facing the perceived pain of others thinking badly of you, talking about you or isolating you. Emphasis on the perceived pain because this isn’t truth. It’s a narrative. Prioritising yourself doesn’t mean others will change the way they are with you. But what this constant approval will do is lead you to losing touch with your own identity and values because you’re living out someone else’s, causing you to disconnect with the real you. There’s a trade-off between seeking approval and staying true to who you are. Truth prevails.
What if your urge to please is just feedback – your heart asking you to come back to yourself?
We often shapeshift, accommodate, and silence ourselves just to stay in someone’s good books – afraid that being fully seen might cost us love, respect, or connection. But that fear? It’s a perception, not a truth.
In choosing approval over authenticity, you slowly disconnect from who you really are. You begin to live someone else’s life, follow someone else’s values – and wonder why you feel lost.
That’s what Be Her Now is – a call back to yourself, an invitation to stop dimming and start daring, to live as the most authentic version of you.
The deeper truth is: You don’t need to be liked by everyone to belong. You belong when you stand rooted in your own values, voice, and identity.
Approval fades. But truth? It anchors you. It frees you. It always prevails.
The Real Reason You Keep People-Pleasing (And Why Willpower Won’t Fix It)
Here’s what no one tells you about people-pleasing: it’s not a character flaw or a weakness you need to overcome through sheer determination. It’s a deeply ingrained subconscious pattern, likely formed in childhood when your survival depended on being “good” and keeping others happy.
Your nervous system learned that approval equals safety, and now it’s running an outdated program that no longer serves you. This is why affirmations about “loving yourself” or reading another self-help book about boundaries feels like putting a band-aid on a broken bone – you’re trying to solve an identity-level issue with surface-level tools.
The missing piece isn’t more willpower or positive thinking. It’s a complete identity rebrand at the subconscious level. When you shift from someone whose worth depends on external validation to someone who operates from unshakeable self-trust, everything changes. Instead of scanning rooms for disapproval, you speak your truth with quiet confidence. Instead of saying “yes” to everything and burning out, you say “no” without guilt because you know your value isn’t tied to your usefulness. Your relationships become deeper because people are connecting with the real you, not a curated version designed to please.
That’s the power of working at the identity level – when you change who you are at the core, your behaviours naturally follow. Programs like Be Her Now understand that lasting transformation happens when you reprogram the subconscious conditioning that’s been running the show, not when you try to think your way into a new personality.
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For deeper understanding of how identity reprogramming works, check out:
The Identity Rebrand™ Method: How Powerful Women Stop Shrinking and Start Leading
Ready to Become Her?
1. Be Her Now – A self-guided journey for the woman done hiding and ready to rise.
Rooted in the Identity Rebrand Method™ – Subconscious rewiring. Vision activation. Embodiment rituals.
£27. Start now and begin showing up as her – today.
2. Free Identity Rebrand Audit™ Guide – A bold first step toward the woman you’re becoming.
Uncover what’s holding you back and map your next-level self.
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